Short.Random.With A Crunch.

comedycentral:

Click here for more of Jon Stewart’s coverage of the recent House Committee on Science, Space and Technology hearing.

Random #1-This one’s called “Context MIA”

The following exchange of dialogue between two friends is based completely off of real conversations, taken from both girls and guys, preserved with the utmost of accuracy and detail. When necessary, transitions are added to provide a coherent sentence and fill in the blanks. You’d be surprised that 90% of what you’ll see below is some of the bizarre and absurd topics that college students partake in every day. Enjoy.

“Today, my hair just looked flat and disgusting. That’s why I hit the bong man, it’s the greatest feeling. I couldn’t stand up!”

            “Damn!”

“Yeah I know right? I’m gonna get a brownee or some shit”

“Dude, it’s free food. Hell yeah!”

“So where’s Brian? Hopefully he’s not balls deep in his girlfriend’s asshole. I’m not a fan of nuts in general”

“Dayum…woah! Does she put out?”

“It’s been going on for four years now…She’s in another state, she’s cheating on him”

“That shit will go really, really badly”

“That’s why I hit the bon-“

“Stop talking!”

“Are you ok? I heard you hurt yourself walking.”

“Sorry, I get bitchy, I just get bitchy. Yeah, I hurt my back”

Did some digging and found these random stories I wrote a long time ago, in a galaxy far far away. Alright, maybe like a year ago
Fallout from Wrestlemania 30

"One!… Two!…….Three?"

The bell rings. I proceed to clutch my head in disbelief while repeating shouting out several ‘oh my god’s. I

Yeah, just like that!

(Before I go on here…I had written this entire post before Tumblr accidently deleted it, so go F#*k yourself Tumblr!!)

The Undertaker lied flat on his back while the numbers 21-1 glowed on the big screen in the Superdome, which grew awkwardly silent. Over two decades of perfection at ‘Mania, BOOM! Gone. Childhood dreams and nostalgia ruined. I mean, look at these people!

So as you can see, it was a huge deal for this to go down. If we’re talking non-wrestling terms, this would be the equivalent of Daryl biting the dust on the Walking Dead, or the ‘Red Wedding’ on Game of Thrones. Jaws hit the floor…..

And then the raging commenced! Yes, soon after the shock of the match had passed, hothead WWE fans took their refined intelligence and grammar skills to the Facebook walls. We have people such as Ardy Hardy Pro (yes, he exists), posting things like, “no Undertaker = no WWE”. To that I say, really? Just because a man who shows up ONCE each year is now retiring, that will bring down the entire company? 

People did not see this coming at all. An absolute shocker. We as the audience expected another victory for Taker. After all, the guy was 21-0! BRACCK Lesnar can’t end it for him this year, right? And that’s why the outcome was slap-in-your-face amazing. If the streak was ever to end, it would have to when we least expected it.

image

And that’s what draws people to wrestling and the WWE. The unpredictability. It’s like watching a soap opera, only the actors are men in spandex who smash each other through tables. Whether you think that’s the most idiotic event ever created or the greatest thing since Kate Upton, it’s clear that the WWE is a tad bit popular. With or without Taker, it’ll keep on rolling on, fighting over briefcases and the like. 

Yup…

Yup…

Colored me surprised. What a shocker. 

Punk’s entrance on RAW 06/17/2013

It’s Clobberin’ Time no more…. :’(

one of my coke rocket vids, still been doing it since 2008

travelingcolors:

Gran Paradiso National Park | Italy (by a galaxy far, far away…)